Small Animals

Ever Seen a Drunk Squirrel?

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Being a tree climbing rodent seems like it would be all fun and games. You get to pass by unnoticed above everything that’s going on below, like a ninja in the branches. But even a true ninja’s abilities would be lessened if he were to go crazy on the booze beforehand. Squirrels will also become less effective tree ninjas when they’ve had a few too many. In some instances they may even get so confused that they think they’re an entirely different animal. Like a disco bunny.

Animals, unlike humans, don’t actually try to get intoxicated. It’s just one of nature’s amusing jokes played on unsuspecting creatures. Humans have the intelligence to know what happens when fruit goes bad. That’s how we’re able to enjoy a delicious glass of wine. An animal see’s a fruit that they normally eat, which is usually tasty. Sometimes, though, that fruit is fermented. Regret likely follows. It’s one of those innocent accidents that provides entertainment for all.

In a squirrels case, drunken tree climbing can be quite dangerous. Although who am I kidding, drunken tree climbing is dangerous no matter what species you are. It’s probably a good thing that this little guy decided to descend to the snowy ground. If he stayed in the trees he might have decided to try his hand at being a monkey. Squirrels lack that crucial opposable thumb that makes monkeying effective.

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I believe about the time when this particular squirrel touched the ground, that’s when the disco music switched on in his mind and the music took over. Apparently this one always had dreams of being a rabbit, too. His dance-like hops are quite amusing. Intoxication is but one way to let out your inner disco bunny, let’s just hope he remembers that bunnies aren’t tree ninjas.

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Julie Antonson

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